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                                                         "But love is not just a giving, its" active "character is reflected in it,

                                                     that it always contains the following basic elements in all its forms: care,

                                                                     Responsibility, respect for the other and realization. "

                                                                                                 -Erich Fromm-


The relationship is a central point in our lives. We all long for a successful love relationship. Often, especially in this difficult area seemingly unbridgeable problems that can be very stressful and can affect all areas of life. Heartache can make you sick. It is one of the hardest things in life to have good relationships. Nobody taught us that.

For this reason, I offer the emotion-focused couple therapy developed by Sue Johnson in Berlin. In this couple therapy and also marriage counseling, couples learn to break down their protective walls and to re-encounter on an emotional level to cope with the negative cycle in their relationship. This can lead to a more positive and emotional shared future. You can not avoid conflicts in a relationship, but you can learn to deal with them together as a couple.

The topic of couple counseling brings uncertainty to many couples. Therefore, my colleague and I have taken a podcast, by already giving an insight into the issue of couples therapy and relationship problems.


The relationship conflicts of a partnership can be discussed not only in a couples counseling but also in a single therapy. For example, when one of the partners is not ready for marriage counseling, or even when one is at a point where one wants to reflect on the relationship for oneself and recognize conflicts, to strengthen the partnership and positive ones To initiate changes.


Even if you are in a personal crisis, individual therapy can be very valuable.

Triggering for such crises are extreme life events, e.g., a separation, death or the loss of a job. Often this is noticeable by persistent mood swings, listlessness or exhaustion, or with permanent dissatisfaction about one's life situation and the desire for a change.

Therapy is about mobilizing lost strengths and powers. First, one has to understand one's life situation. Then solutions can be worked out. This process takes place in a mutual conversation and helps to recognize and appreciate their blockages and to cope with their resources the current situation. In this process, personal change and growth are promoted.


What if we are only arguing in our relationship?


Couples who come to me in Berlin for couple therapy often talk about having the feeling that they are only quarreling, other couples are telling that they have the feeling that they no longer love the other partner or that they are no longer loved in the relationship to become. Many couples feel that besides the quarrels, they only live side by side. The connection seems to be deadlocked.


With emotion-focused couples therapy, I can rebalance relationships that are hard and unhappy, shaped by a more emotional, closer connection.

Often I observe in therapy that the couples are in a negative interaction cycle.

This pattern is marked by misunderstandings within the relationship. Often, this pattern begins with one of the two partners seeking to protect themselves from injury within the relationship, and therefore builds a protective response. These may be that he shows much anger, but also that he retires ever further in the relationship. Through both reactions, the partner is hurt and reacts with his protective response (anger or withdrawal) so as not to feel like the anger or withdrawal of the other, an injured person. Other negative cycles show up in marriage counseling. In the end, these patterns all cause couples to no longer to feel loved and secure in the relationship.

Couples who come to my practice for couples therapy in Berlin can no longer clearly define the central problem of their relationship, as more and more topics end up in conflict due to the negative interaction cycle.


In my practice for single and couple therapy in Berlin, I work with the emotion-focused couples therapy. This is scientifically sound and shows time and again in practice as well as in science, how well it helps couples in the long term.



What to consider when looking for the right couple therapy?

Couples often talk to me about how great the range of couples therapy in Berlin is, and they wonder what to look for when looking for couples therapy.

Since couples therapy is not a protected term (as well as coaching), unfortunately, anyone who thinks he is qualified enough, even without being a psychologist, can offer that. However, studies show that problems in the relationship have a strong influence on physical and mental health (cardiovascular problems, sleep disorders, back pain, adjustment disorders, depression, etc.). Also, children are often involved in the couple problems. Couple therapy with a psychologist can therefore also have a psychopreventive effect on the children.

Also, one should inquire which method is used in therapy for couples.

There are many different methods such as behavior therapy couple therapy, systemic couple therapy, emotion-focused couples therapy and schema therapy with couples.

Here, the couples should firstly look at which therapy direction appeals to them the most, and second, how far they have been researched.


Do you have further questions about single or couple therapy?

Then you can send me an e-mail. I'm happy about every question!


Studies on Emotional Focused Couple Therapy


Here you can read articles and studies that give an overview of the effects that emotion-focused couples therapy has on couples with relationship problems.



Anna Wilitzki


Paar- und Einzeltherapie

Rhinower Straße 5

10437 Berlin

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